This is part of an episodic series, The Therapist’s Networking Guide.
To see the previous post in this series, click here.
If you are new to networking or have yet to find your own comfortable way, then taking time to identify myths, typical blunders, and common networking gaffs may ease your way on down the road.
Myth #1 that I had to get over was the one my mother taught me in kindergarten . . . Don’t talk to strangers. Sound familiar to anyone else out there? Think about it. If you struggle with talking to people you don’t know, then you probably learned this lesson, too.
Alfred Adler would have been the first to point out that many of the lessons we needed to learn as children no longer serve us well. If “Don’t talk to strangers” was once a guiding rule for you, it may be time to re-examine whether this lesson is still worth hanging on to. As for me, I gave it up a long time ago and have found that my ability to talk to anyone (human or fence post) helps put others at ease and makes my networking much more enjoyable!
"IMG_3638" by pkdon50
Myth #2 might be . . . Act like you know what you’re doing. You don’t need to act as if you know everything about the new networking group you’ve just shown up to check out. Neither do you need to fake that you know or remember people you’ve never met before. What you do need to know about is your professional expertise, a few current events, and basic social graces.
Myth #3 . . . Networking is serious business. Well, yes and no. You want to seriously benefit from the time, energy, and money that you are putting into it. But, networking is probably going to be less effective if you make it a somber and dull occasion. Try to relax! Plan to have fun! Maybe even laugh a little!
Myth #4 . . . Good things come to those who wait. Nope. If you passively / shyly stand in the back of the room and wait for potential referral sources to make their way to you, you are misguided. People who make things happen don’t have time to hunt you down for an introduction. Your job, if you want to network effectively, is to identify and approach the key people that can help you grow your business. Don’t wait for those you want to meet; instead, put them in your sight line as soon as you get to your meeting and take the initiative to meet them.
Myth #5 . . . If I make a mistake, I might not get a referral. That’s called risk aversion and this little blunder can kill your business. Being afraid to take simple human risks . . . like not knowing what to say or forgetting a name can end up costing you serious relationship assets.
Take a breath, take a risk, and be prepared to admit that on occasion you will forget what you were talking about or someone’s name. We all do it. It’s what makes us human. It’s NOT what costs you business!
If you haven’t done so already, it’s time to unpack your networking baggage. See what gets in the way. And, let us know if you come up with other networking myths / blunders / gaffs to add to our list!
Great ideas Tamara. I’ve usually been scared away from networking because it feels fake or as though I am only talking to people because I want them to help me with something (e.g., referrals). My wife has shown me the power of networking (she has a very successful network of professionals whom she gets referrals from), but my personality tends to shy away from being open to meeting many new people. It is scary for me! Sad, but true.
I like meeting folks, like yourself, in intimate settings, like coffee shops, instead of larger group events. I guess we have our comfort zones, and that is ok, as long as we are willing to be uncomfortable from time to time.
I appreciate your willingness to share your insights on your blog.
Shaun! I’m so honored that you’ve dropped in here to visit my blog and join in the conversation!
Thank you for being so candid about where you are with networking! There’s absolutely nothing wrong with networking one on one in intimate settings.In fact, even if you start out at a formal networking event, that one on one relationship really is the only way you’re going to build a referral base. You introverts have definitely got that part right!
There’s also lots of ways for introverts to network and build a private practice. I need to write a post or two on that, don’t I?! But, for now, Shaun, let me just suggest that by joining online communities – which means that you are commenting and making your views / concerns heard and also sharing your resources, experience, and expertise – you are also networking online. Those virtual connections can turn out to be invaluable to you and others as you grow your private practice.
So . . . if you (and others) find this to be a more comfortable way to connect, I hope you’ll drop back in to our community often. Take a moment to introduce yourself, what you do, and where you are. Don’t be surprised if your network begins to grow!