Jenny Glick, MA, MSC, LMFT is one of those therapists that talks often about the need to be awake. What sets her apart from so many other therapists is that she is one of the therapists who really is awake . . . walking her talk . . . noticing what doesn’t fit . . . and taking time to make the changes necessary to create extraordinary outcomes for herself and her clients, too. I’m so pleased to introduce you to my new friend and colleague, Jenny Glick!
(If you are interested in writing a guest post, check out the guidelines here.)
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A Guest Post by Jenny Glick, MA, MSC, LMFT
The Ordinary
I am a rule follower. Always have been.
I am the girl who sits in the front row of the classroom diligently taking notes having read all of the assigned material in preparation for the class. The girl whose hand shoots up before the teacher even finishes asking her question to the roomful of students.
Like many of you, being a rule follower has served me well in life.
Top grades. Check.
Graduate degrees. Check.
Counseling certifications. Check.
Private practice. Check.
And, like many of you, I followed the trajectory of the counseling profession and worked at a variety of agencies after my schooling – gaining experience, receiving mentoring, honing my therapeutic skills, and strengthening my clinical intuition.
The Dream
At this point, some of us dream of doing our own thing . . . having our own office, our own hours, our own office politics, and earning more money. I didn’t realize at the time that I was making a dramatic and personal shift from ordinary to extraordinary.
Think about when you began your private practice . . . the excitement, the enthusiasm, the trepidation, the endless list of things to do. Along the way, you began to make decisions . . . some ordinary and some out-of-the-ordinary.
The Extraordinary
What do extraordinary decisions feel like?
Extraordinary decisions often come with a shot of adrenaline, a quiver in the tummy, and a shiver of fear. Such decisions awaken the quiet voices of, “Should you really do that?” And the ever paralyzing, “No one else is doing that!”
I was taught like many of you to play nice. Don’t rock the boat. Don’t create a problem. Do not promote controversy. Keep it neat and tidy in a box, play by the rules, do not ruffle any feathers, and certainly don’t make anyone feel bad.
Make. Ordinary. Choices.
The first four years growing my private practice, I did just that. I followed the rules. I played it safe. I had a reasonable practice . . . respectable, quiet, simple . . . fine. It was fine.
Telling the Truth
As I began year five, I realized in that sinking-stomach kind of way, that I was holding back. I realized that I was afraid of throwing my whole, wild self in to my practice.
I was quietly terrified of failing and being naked in front of the world. I was afraid of:
- really being seen,
- being “too much”,
- owning and standing in my personal vision,
- making others feel small, and
- succeeding in manifesting what I was put on this earth to create.
My ordinary choices were the garb that covered my fear of being extraordinary.
What If . . . ?
A few months ago, I was having new business cards made. I had the usual information on my card: name, phone, address, etc. As I looked at the image of my card on my computer screen, I thought to myself, “I want to call myself something different. I am tired of marriage, family and child therapist.” What if I call myself, “transformation advocate”? Or “relationship guru”? “Ooooh!” said my inner-cynic, “no one does that! People won’t think you are professional if you do that. And you won’t have any clients.”
Read: Be small. Don’t do anything different. Don’t be vulnerable or open to change.
Sure, we all know about the importance of being vulnerable. We talk about vulnerability with our clients…how vulnerability is important in relationships with others and with ourselves. We watch and pass along Brene Brown’s TedX Talk repeatedly.
Meeting Courage
But what happens after recognizing your own vulnerability? What happens when you allow the swishy-knee-shaking-heart-thumping fear to meet with your reticent courage in hopes that something new might emerge? What happens when you not only allow but invite the oyster-soft parts of yourself to be the fuel for something out-of-the-ordinary?
Alchemy happens.
The extraordinary is born.
There is a saying, “If you want something you’ve never had, you need to do something that you’ve never done.” By definition, this means shaking the hand of the unknown and saying, “Good to meet ya! You scare the shit out of me but here I am anyway.”
Aaah . . . and this is the place where there are no rules and where you know you are alive! And you know what else? You can feel the innervation, the excitement and so can your clients, your colleagues, and all of those people that you spend time networking and connecting with. Those people, who you are pitching your work to can feel the aliveness of what you are embarking on and you know what? It is contagious.
Standing in My Courage
I have found, in the last year, that people want to learn from me. They ask, “How did you build your practice so fast?” And, “What are you doing to make this work?” Sure, I have been working with a coach, I devote a lot of time to making my business run, I invest money in my business, and I check off the to-do list each week. But the real secret to the vitality of my business?
- I dare to stand in the vision of my work even when that vision doesn’t match anyone else’s or seems impossible by conventional standards.
- I have a relationship with my fear and vulnerability that keeps my business alive and fresh and keeps me humble.
- I support and encourage others in standing in their own extraordinariness.
- I do my best to not take myself too seriously in the process.
So what will be your extraordinary today?
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Jenny Glick, MA, MSC, LMFT is Be A Wealthy Therapist Elite Coach with Casey
Truffo and the clinical director of the Counseling Center of Cherry Creek (www.counselingcenterofcherrycreek.com) in Denver, Colorado, USA.
Jenny! This was great! I’m so glad that you put in there that you thrive by supporting others, because I seriously look up to you as a mentor in our community and a great colleague. This post totally reflects my own feelings about taking the leap to hire someone in my practice so that I can take a year off of seeing clients to be with my second child. I felt like I had two crap choices – go back to work to early, or let my “other baby” flounder in neglect by closing the clinic doors and staying home with my heart. The courage to create my third option really does make me weak in the knees, but with the right kind of company (like-minded go getters who ignite each other, like you), lots of to-do lists, and the courage to invest some money in my practice, I’m now poised to order business cards for my new contractor therapist. Regardless of how this turns out, the coolest thing has been experiencing the relationships that I have found by seeking out those who pursue extraordinary stuff with courage and honesty! You go girl!
WOW, Kat! Talk about somebody finding their courage and making an extraordinary choice – HOW COOL! Thanks for helping pave the way for others to choose / find / create third ways (and waves)! There are always more than two choices – always!
Thank you Kat for the kind words and sharing your own “extraordinary” with us! What a gift it is in deed to be a part of community of therapists who can support one another in our own vulnerability and transformation. Here’s to a year off with your second child…and growing your work in the process! Cheers to you, friend.
Thank YOU, Jenny, for reminding us that we can ALL make extraordinary choices every day! (I’m so tickled to have your voice here)
Well I am feeling so fortunate right now…fortunate to be in the company of such inspiring therapists — Tamara, Jenny, and Kat — I know this may sound cheesy, but I do truly look up to all of you as savvy business women who have adept clinical skills (and continue to nurture all of those), and who also are willing to be vulnerable.
I feel that I have long had a love-hate relationship with vulnerability but in this past year I have really challenged myself to embrace a more loving and compassionate relationship with it and with myself. I believe that has truly helped my practice grow and to empower me as a competent and confident clinician. I am also growing my practice, with several supervisees and soon an intern, and I am learning every day the challenges and joys of diversifying my clinical experience. This invites me to look fear and courage in the eyes almost daily.
I have always been the one who eagerly and gratefully learned from those whom I admire (and still do every day!), but I am now leaping into the extraordinary by giving of my expertise and experience to others in the form of training. This is scary many times (and keeps me awake at night), as I’m continually on a journey and see-saw with my confidence as a counselor, but I now do TRULY believe in my worth and my ability to help others and I try to be open with that in my work. This comes from a leap, as Brene Brown talks about, into unknown territory. Thank you Jenny, for outlining your own journey and courage for us. I will be sharing this post with clients, as they are walking a line of venturing out of their comfort zones in the service of healthy change every day.
Hi, Kate! This is so exciting to see so many of you guys / gals stretching and dipping your toe into bigger waters! I think we can all do that! Are you a Marianne Williamson fan? You remind me of that quote in her book A Return to Love – “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
I believe that is true about you and me and every other new and seasoned therapist that’s out there! Thanks, Kate, for stepping into your power – there are many other therapists and clients that need you to lead the way.
Thank you Tamara, for sharing that quote. Yes, I am a huge Marianne Williamson fan and that quote really resonated with me –especially “as we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” 🙂
I have learned along the way that when we are each stepping into our own courage . . . our own bigness and light, we are always liberating others to do the same.
What a fun, encouraging post! Jenny, you speak with authenticity and a genuine passion for your work. It’s exciting to gain energy from others’ passion. Now I’m all fired up! Thank you!
Hi, Laura! Welcome to Private Practice from the Inside Out!and thank you for taking time to drop in today! So . . . I love that you’re all fired up! What’s the choice point that you’re facing right now in Maryland? Is there anything we can do to support you on your journey?
Laura, thank you for chiming in! It is always fun to share in the energy with one another where we can…and Tamara has providing this amazing forum for us to do just that. Shine on!
Kate what a beautiful testimony to your own courage to dance with vulnerability! Yay you! And yay for your clients who get to go that much deeper with you as well. I really appreciate hearing how your vulnerability and strength manifests in the “everyday” of growing your work, your business, and your heart. I feel delighted to share in your journey and witness your unfolding. Thank you thank you!
Jenny – I really appreciate your post on going bigger, following your dreams and instincts and not letting the inner critic beat you down. I don’t know if you feel comfortable sharing here, or if it feels appropriate, but I finished reading the post with a real curiosity about what leaps you are taking. I have found your website somehow through this or the MYOB forum and love the videos you use. I also used one or two ideas about how you structure your menu. So thanks on all fronts and keep up the great work!
Good morning, Amy! I’m curious, too, about Jenny’s choice points, the extraordinary choices and difference she’s making! Thanks for asking what I think a lot of us are thinking!
And, on a different note, I don’t know if I’ve taken the time to say how much I appreciate your voice here in our community, Amy. You are always thoughtful and supportive of me, our guest posters, and our ever-growing community here. When someone tweets about our cool tribe here I always say a quick and silent “thank you” for each of you that continues to make this a welcoming place for all those in helping and healing professions.
Hey Tamara:
Thanks so much for kind words on a day when I really needed it! I feel the same about this online community and your positive force. Thank you.
Uh-oh! A cloudy day? Sending lots of sunshine and courage your way, Amy!
Good morning, Amy and good to meet you! I am glad that my post spoke to you and am delighted that I have been able to prompt some ideas for your own work! The shared knowledge that we have as clinicians and entrepreneurs is quite extraordinary and I am such an advocate of sharing our information…”why recreate the wheel?”, right?
Like you, I often check out colleague’s websites to see what they are doing and how I can learn from them! And, I check out Tamara’s amazing blog to stay on top of what is new in private practice! 🙂
One of the things that I notice about the “leaps” that I take in my work is that they are always precipitated by my own emotional and spiritual works as well. Often, when I am brought face to face with some of my own inner work around (pick one: judgment, fear, embarrassment, shame, fear, fear…fear) it is quickly mirrored in my private practice: anything from taking on a client that feels right on the edge of a good fit, to setting appropriate boundaries for myself with networking opportunities, to implementing a new “tool” in a session with a client, to investing what might feel like a lot of money in pick one: coaching, website development, a new office space, trainings, etc.
The “leap” for me is, yes, about some of the concrete things (hiring a contract therapist, expanding my office space, coaching therapists) but more about stretching the boundaries of my own psychic/energetic limits…noticing when and how I clamp down energetically and want to protect myself or get small. This is an invitation for me to breathe and check in with this part of myself and invite some love to flood into those nooks so that my “leap” is from a rooted space. Leaping in a oh-my-gosh-I-am-scared-by-I-love-myself-too-much-not-to-give-it-my-all place.
Thank you Amy for the question and for being so involved in these awesome forums!
“. . . noticing when and how I clamp down energetically and want to protect myself or get small.” Yes! Clarissa Pinkola-Estes talks about standing in the shadow of the overculture and not dipping down into the “underculture” . . . our roots and the source of all our energies. Shrinking, getting small, hiding, standing in the shadows . . . all the things that take suck the life . . . and the joy right out of us and out of the work . . . the BIG, IMPORTANT, LIFE-GIVING and LIFE-ALTERING WORK THAT WE ARE MEANT TO BE DOING!
And, Jenny, I misread your line about leaping in an “oh-my-gosh” kinda way and thought you wrote “Leaping in an oh-my-gosh-I-am-scared-but-I-love-mytself-too-much-not-to-give-it-all-my-space” and, that’s right, too. The world need us to be 100% committed and willing to step out into all of who we are . . . right now . . . even if we aren’t sure about next steps. Committing to be right where you are even in your ambiguity is exactly where you are supposed to be.
And, of course, I love that you continue to invest in learning about your next steps. Congrats on your new coaching venture, too!
Hello! I have absorbed so much information from this site, but have not posted a comment until having read this post. Jenny’s story is inspiring and I felt that it spoke directly to me, as I can totally relate to this struggle. I’m happy that I happened to see this post today and will probably reread it as I navigate my discomfort with meeting my own courage. Beautifully written, thank you!
Hi, Carol and welcome to Private Practice from the Inside Out! I’m so glad that you are finding the information and inspiration here to support you on your journey. And, thank you for taking the time to actually reach out to let Jenny know that her words have touched you in a meaningful way. It makes such a difference to those of us who are finding our own courage in a very public way.
I took a quick peek at your website, Carol, and love your walk and talk therapy approach. I was in your lovely state in September when I sneaked into town to see a few clients and play a bit, too. So sorry we hadn’t connected before then. I would have loved an opportunity to meet you in person!
Now that you’ve dipped your toe into commenting here, I hope your voice will show up more often as we continue to build the largest online community in the world for mental health professionals who are interested in marketing their private practices! I look forward to hearing from you!
Hi Tamara,
Thank you for responding, checking out my website and the positive words about my walk and talk therapy approach. I just launched the website and the walk and talk approach about six weeks ago, so I’m in the early stages of getting the word out. I am intending to become more involved and to contribute to this forum and community. You’ve created an amazing resource in information and connecting us mental health professionals who are usually isolated. I I hope you enjoyed your visit to NJ, maybe next time you’re in the area we can connect! In the meantime, I look forward to being part of the Private Practice from the Inside Out community!
Lovely!
Hello Carol and bravo you for showing up by posting! What a gift for me that my words found a place in you today and that they might support you today in your work and life. It is truly wonderful that we have this forum at AllThingsPrivatePractice to support and guide one another to further expansion and growth.
Like Tamara, I checked out your website and just LOVE seeing other clinicians using movement in their work. And I love what you call it, “Walk and Talk Clarity”. How inviting that is!
Thank you again for you comment and best regards to you.
Hi Jenny,
Thank you for your reply! I looked at your site as well and I love it! Very comprehensive, informative and gives one a true sense of who you are. To be able to connect with a potential client through a webite is quite an accomplishment and I can see that your site offers that fully. Kudos to you! I look forward to continuing to learn and connect with outstanding professionals like yourself and build my own practice. Thanks again for your post and reply!
be well,
Carol
Thanks Carol for your kind words. You are in good company here at AllThingsPrivatePractice to continue to learn and grow. It is one of the best parts of what we do…we get to stretch as therapists and ALSO as business owners! So much to learn! Looking forward to continuing to see what unfolds for you! Best wishes, j
Wonderful, wonderful writing Jenny! I love how you share of yourself purposefully and honestly. Thanks for being a daring and courageous voice in these challenging ecological times! Love to you.
Thank you Jenny for commenting here! It has been a joy and privilege to work with you professionally over the years and see your work grow and transform. Love right back to ya!
Jenny Finn! Welcome to Private Practice from the Inside Out and thank you for taking time show up here! I just dropped in to your website and knew I recognized your name from somewhere. You are THE Jenny Finn! I just saw your terrific TED Talk this past week on Befriending the Darkness! In fact, I think I have that cued up to share with everyone here tomorrow. Thank you for dropping in here and also for sharing your Ted Talk. I hope you, too, will be back often to share your voice!
Thank you for watching my Tedx talk Tamara, and for such a thoughtful, caring response here. What a wonderful thing you have going with this blog- a great resource! And thank you for sharing my Tedx talk with others. It was such an incredible experience and Jenny Glick was even there to cheer me on! She is the best! Many blessings to you and on your work in the world.
Hi Tamara,
I have had aspirations for a while of owning my own private practice, I know that currently I am too young and don’t have the experience or qualifications needed just yet to achieve my goals, but through this fantastic blog I realized what it really takes. I think so many of the things spoken about in this post can be related to everyone’s day to day lives, they really are words that should be applied to everyday living, especially when looking to under take and succeed in this line of work. I appreciate being able to access such valuable I information and look forward to continuing to learn and strive towards having my own successful practice, thank you.
Fraser.
Hi, Fraser! So glad to have your Scottish voice showing up here! I so appreciate hearing from the folks in our online community here and happy to know you are among us! What is it you do right now, Fraser, and where are you in Scotland?
I don’t know about being “too young” for private practice . . . but I do know that you are wiser than some to realize the benefit of having some clinical experience under your belt before venturing in to private practice. Is clinical experience after your schooling required in Scotland in order to practice independently? Or, can you get your degree and then just hang your shingle as an independent practitioner? I’m always curious about mental health practices in other countries . . . .
And, you’re right, of course. Jenny’s words are wisdom that anyone can apply to their lives!
Thank you for this post. So encouraging and giving me some things to chew on regarding my practice.
Thank you Jill for your comments. It is good to hear you voice here and know that you have something to chew on to grow your work! Best regards,
Hi, Jill! I hope your week is going well. And, I’m eager to hear where those wheels in your head are taking you concerning that practice of yours! I know you always have something brewing. Care to share?
Wow, reading back these comments and I’m struck by the positive energy. Thank you again, I’m so glad I found this blog!
Glad you found AllThingsPrivatePractice as well! Tamara’s site is truly amazing…so many great gems here AND positive energy. What more could you want?! Hope to see you again,
🙂 I know, Laura! For as long as this community as been here, it really has been full of warm and generous-spirited therapists. And, the longer we have been here, the more voices we’ve had to show up to contribute to the conversations. I was telling my BlogStart for Therapists class last month that the conversations that happen after posts get shared are often the meatier and richer places to hang out on blogs. Of course, it’s scary to a lot of therapists to actually comment the first time or two. But, soon, you realize that it’s like hanging out at a cafe with a bunch of really cool people – only in your pajamas and no one cares what you look like. Instead, you just get to have really great conversations!
Ah, look! You’ve got me rambling on my favorite topic now! In any case, thanks for joining in and bringing your own positive energy to the table! It only makes us stronger!