Or . . . Why Should I Drive an Extra 10 Minutes to Work with You?
That’s what potential clients want to know.
That’s why they are picking up the phone and calling you.
They want you to tell them (or else they have to figure it out for themselves) . . . .
What’s so special about you?
Do you know the answer?
Can you tell them in just a sentence or two?
Here’s the deal . . . .
EMDR trained therapists are a dime a dozen.
Everybody touts using CBT to work with depression.
Virtually all child therapists work with sand.
So what?
All licensed mental health professionals perform at a basic minimum standard of practice.
Do you offer anything more?
Anything different?
No?
Not really?
Not sure?
Then that’s exactly what your next step is in growing your private practice!
Figure it out!
And, if you need help, hire me!
Or, if you want to tackle this chore on your own, go for it!
But if that’s the case, then give yourself a deadline.
Put that deadline in your calendar.
Bookmark this post.
And, come back to it on your deadline.
If you’ve figured out by then what makes working with you different than working with one of your colleagues, drop back in (below) and let me know what that difference is.
If you haven’t figured it out, then do something different . . . . Hire ME!
I can help you figure out what makes you so special!
Tamara, I totally agree. Figure out what separates you from the crowd. Also, make it real from who YOU are and what YOU do and connect to YOUR passion. You want to attract people you want to work with in a capacity that floats your boat.
Questions to ask others when doing it yourself: Ask family, friends, colleagues from different walks of life.
1) Ask five people. “What comes to your mind about me as a person when you hear my name? What stands out about me?”
2) Ask another five people: What comes to your mind when you hear my name as a therapist or business owner?
Keep a journal with the answers and include deadlines with some percolating time for crafting your unique message. This process took me about 3 months and a good coach helps!
Good morning, Brenda! What a lovely way to start the morning!
I love your questions and your reference to journaling under the guidance of a good coach. I, too, used a coach to help me craft my message. And, even more than the actual message, she helped me mine for what really was / is unique about working with me. You and I both do that type of mining so I know you get it.
So many therapists though think that they should automatically and instantaneously “know” what their unique offering is. And, what I (and you) know is that it really does take some focused and dedicated time to exploring our strong suits and our challenges before we get really really clear about what we offer. It rarely just shows up in a neat package right off the bat. And, it takes a little longer after that to flesh out the language to talk about this with clients and referral sources.
I wonder if you have found a particular exercise to be useful in helping therapists recognize their own unique message.
Tamara, I am glad you asked me what exercises I use to help therapists find their uniqueness. I have developed a tool called Radiant Living Tool Box and Gift Set based on the processes of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT).
I use ACT with therapy clients and with coaching clients. It is an evidence-based process. I have listed the steps to the process.
♦ Start with a short focusing exercise
♦ Values Card sort: This step helps to clarify what is most important to the person. The process helps the person get in touch with their core values. Authenticity is being in alignment with who and what matters most to you. Also. passion is derived from what matters most.
♦ Then, using the core values I use a process of radiant thinking. Most people know this a Mind Mapping. Fantasitc tool (evidence-based) for problem solving and generating ideas.
♦ Last is goal setting using a SMART/GROWTH model.
I am offering a free workshop using this process on October 25th at People House. If you want to view the product here is a link:
http://creatingyourbeyond.com/radiant-living-tool-box-and-gift-set-2/
I hope this isn’t too much shamless self promotion.
Thank you ♥ ♥ for asking me what exercieses I use to help people define and clarify their uniqueness.
My favorite peeve – people on Psychology Today profiles who waste words telling people that they’re warm, accepting and that they listen well. You and the 40 other therapists in your zip code.
Ohhh, Peggy! You’re cracking me up! And, yes, you are right. That’s not what potential clients are looking for and, as my favorite geek, Beth Hayden, would say . . . “They’re wasting precious real estate online!”
By the way, Peggy – You’re wasting precious real estate right here by not putting up a tiny little picture of you! Here’s a tutorial that can show you how to do that (for free).
Thanks for dropping in today to chat!
Tamara, I love this concept! I also wanted to mention that clients will sometimes say that it is much easier to talk with me than it is to talk with [insert family member, significant other, friend, etc. here]. I will sometimes ask them to think about what makes it easier to talk to me or what makes them more comfortable when they are in session. The hope here is so that perhaps a small thing (such as not being interrupted so much, or how I actually “mean it” when I ask how they are) might be something that the other person is willing to change or there could be a way that the client could change it in their mind and react differently.
I find it fascinating that some clients will come in and talk about all kinds of different things with so much insight and yet say that they struggle with communicating. Sometimes small changes are a wonderful place to start – and I love the empowerment that comes with small successes.
In addition to my own self-awareness, asking this question usually leads to some very interesting conversation. Sometimes clients point out things that I don’t even realize I’m actually doing.
Good morning, Lauren! Thanks for sharing a great way to conduct that fact-finding mission! It’s a great way to figure out how you are different and for your clients to consider a different way of being with their family member!
I’ve been thinking about this a lot and why certain clients stay with me a long time and the different between them and the ones that leave after a shorter time. why they sought me out and not someone down the street.
Hi, Jill! I’ve missed your voice here, too! I guess that little one of yours is keeping you busy these days!
So . . . you’re taking this conversation even a step further. Instead of asking what’s different that makes a client choose you in the beginning, you are asking what keeps ’em coming back! That’s a great question, too! What are you figuring out?
Yes the baby, the five year old, my clients and redesigning my website are keeping me very busy
Thanks, Tamara, for the inspiration to do what I’ve been meaning to do.
Just updated my Psychology Today profile, and my website to reflect the advanced training I’m getting from the CBT experts at Stanford.
Thanks again.
Lisa
Hi Tamara,
First time commenting. Great topic! I think this is so important especially here in Denver where there are a million therapists to choose from. It was a little easier for me to figure out what sets me apart since I was a dietitian first, therapist second. Having both of these degrees naturally sets me apart from others that also work with people with eating disorders. Also, I’ve done much introspection and journaling on this topic. Both Lauren and Brenda pointed out some fantastic ways to further figure out what makes each therapist unique in their own way. Also, I think the older one gets the more comfortable we are with our “quirks” which sets us apart from others. Thanks again for the great article!
Melissa – love the quirk comment. Now I can add, “What your quirk?” Ask others, ” What quirking about me that make me different?” And thank you for the compliment.
🙂 Brenda, I just like having you in the house!
Melissa,
One of the things that I like about counseling is that sometimes an intervention does not lead the therapeutic conversation in the direction that I thought it would, but opens another door into something I had no idea about. That’s really what happened with this whole concept of asking clients how I am different from other people in their lives. It all started out as a way to help them to see how it would be easier for them to communicate with others in their lives. It just so happens that hearing about why their communication with me is so effective is a happy side effect. 🙂
Lauren, I’m so with you on that enjoying the ride and being prepared for the unexpected. I think it’s what I like best about counseling – it’s always an adventure for me and the client! I’m not much of a risk-taker in my personal life so facing the unknown in some psychological adventure (where there’s almost always multiple “right” ways of getting anywhere . . . . Now that’s a high that I can get into!
Melissa! Welcome to Private Practice from the Inside Out! I so appreciate you talking about two of your identities – as dietitian and therapist! There are several Speech and Language Pathologists, quite a few authors, and at least a dentist that I know of that quietly lurk here but are a little too timid to join our conversations publicly. Perhaps you’ll be the model they need to become more vocal here in our community:).
I also love that you are noting how we developmentally evolve to “get more comfortable” with our “quirks.” I so feel that way, too. I was telling someone the other day that I really loved the young woman I was at 23 years of age. But, I also have a lot of compassion, in hindsight, for that young woman, too. My confidence and courage and willingness to push boundaries, see differently, and be seen differently have definitely grown with each decade. It’s not like I’m an entirely different person than I was at 24. Instead, it’s more like . . . it’s more like who I was at 23 has been magnified and tumbled and polished up so that I’m clearer about who I am and what I want and what I was meant to do / be. And, that little journey helps me understand much more about how I am different.
Melissa, I hope you’ll be back often to initiate and join the conversations here at Private Practice from the Inside Out!
I will definitely be back Tamara! I appreciate you taking the time to respond to my comment, especially when you have so many to respond to. I really like your blog posts and have found many of them helpful for me in starting out practice,. I will continue to de-lurk and hopefully others will as well 🙂
Melissa, I hate it when I blog and no one engages with me or the others in the community. I know we are all busy growing our practices. That goes for me, too! But if you don’t talk with me – or each other – this would be a very dry nuts and bolts website. The best resources on practice-building come from those in the trenches – not those that “used to be in private practice” but decided to get rich doing something else (because, of course, how to build a practice changes). Nor does the best advice come from those who thought about it but never did it. It comes from each of you who has taken the crazy-making-but-courageous steps to get there. And, that means your comments are like gold to those who aren’t quite as far along as you are! So very happy to host those important conversations right here.
(It’s also, by the way, the most widely-read independent blog online that is dedicated to providing information and inspiration to mental health professionals here in the USA and around the globe in building a strong and vibrant private practice.) thanks for being part of our community here at Private Practice from the Inside Out.
Tamara,
You must be reading our thoughts! It sounds like this is a question heavy on many therapists’ minds. I am not only trying to identify what I provide that’s different than the counselor in the office next door: I’m trying to fit this description into my marketing. It’s a work in progress but so far I try to convey that I work with “teens who self-harm, parents who have counted the last straw, and couples who have lost all hope.” Along with being a professional counselor I’m also a pastoral counselor. Finding the balance between “specializing” and “pigeon-holing” seems to be a continual education and (especially with the pastoral piece) I sometimes fear putting off prospective clients.
I’m also trying to find different modes of doing therapy, looking into online counseling and less conventional ways of conducting the process. I’m going to look through the archives here, but do any past posts relevant to less conventional counseling come to mind?
Thank you (so much!) This site and forum is such a gift to those of us working our way through what can sometimes feel like a wilderness.
Oh, Katie! Welcome to Private Practice from the Inside Out and thank you for taking time to join us in this conversation. Thank you, too, for identifying your own dual roles. It really can be a balancing act on many fronts when starting out in this field . . . much less in private practice. Hopefully those aren’t coinciding for you.
Here’s a few posts on working from home that might give you one way of working that some consider to be unconventional:
– Things to Consider When Working from Home
– 7 Considerations for Setting Up a Home Office
– 7 More Considerations for Working Out of Your Home.
I would love to hear more from you concerning your thoughts about specializing vs. “pigeon-holing.” Care to share? I look forward to your voice in our community!
Hi (again!) Tamara,
First of all, I am really glad you passed along a post with a link to the Workshifting site. This should be a stop for all private practice clinicians, whether or not they work from home. Great resources for the more portable office!
As for specializing versus pigeon-holing, I guess one example is that a lot of people know I work with children and adolescents. I also work with adults (individuals and couples) but I’ve somehow come to be known as “the kid therapist” and so the referrals that come my way are mainly for children. I share an office suite with five other therapists, none of whom work with people under 12 years old. So when a kid comes their way, they send them straight to me. I am grateful for all referrals and actually do love working with kids but also like to have some people above the age of 8 on my caseload.
So as I write this out, I’m realizing that one way to focus my specialization is not so much a certain age range but a method or mode of therapy. Maybe communicating that I do therapy outdoors or use mindfulness interventions is a more effective direction!
It is easy to get known for doing X or working with Y when that is what your language (both orally and in writing) is focused on. Rather than talking about a particular theory (which will eventually be out of vogue) or a particular technique (which will likely be considered “old school” at some point), or a particular population or issue that you work with, consider talking more about the benefits your clients receive from working with you. That will allow both 8 year olds and 80 year olds to be considered as appropriate referrals to you.
And, if you are seeing more children than you want to be seeing, that’s a great opportunity to build some reciprocal referring relationships with other child therapists in your area. Don’t overlook the opportunities to refer out! That can support a steady influx of referrals (in gratitude) to you.
What a great question! I”m a child therapist and when parents come to me with behavioral concerns I work like a detective to determine the underlying problem. Once we have the problem identified it’s not difficult to identify the strategies that are needed. I work hard to get things moving in a positive direction in a short amount of time.
I rock as a child therapist! I should probably have that printed on a t-shirt. 🙂
Pam, kudos to you for recognizing that you are really good at what you do. I love your idea for the T-shirt.
I also wanted to mention that you’re quite right about there being an underlying problem when working with children and also with adolescents. Sometimes the underlying problem is with the parents (for example, occasionally I meet a parent who honestly doesn’t believe that they can say no or in some way convey that their child cannot do something because it makes them a “bad parent.” Sometimes parents really lack the skills needed to set boundaries of that the other parts of their relationship can be more of what they would like them to be. Other times there are real emotional reasons behind behaviors and it is remarkable to me how they seem to just “appear” sometimes. I know that sometimes it’s not even clear how a behavior relate to an emotion or another previous occurrence, and when it all comes together, it is really quite a profound moment.
Hi, Pam! Thanks for dropping in! I completely get that you are a great child therapist and trainer and supervisor and client advocate, too. And, I’m betting that you believe all therapists should “work like a detective,” “identify the strategies that are needed,” and “get things moving” toward clients’ goals as quickly as possible. Is that right? That’s what I think any good therapist would do.
So . . . (nudge, nudge) . . . What make therapist with you so special? (And, YES, you should have those T-shirts made because you do rock!)
And, by the way – how’s the new practice in Texas coming along?
The bottom line is that I get results. I rarely have to refer a client to another therapist.
I just signed a lease yesterday and hope to have a practice and play therapy training center up and running January 1st.
🙂 Clearly you are doing a few things right, Pam! Congrats to you on the lease. Can’t wait to see what you’re up to!
🙂 Clearly you are doing a few things right, Pam! Congrats to you on the lease. Can’t wait to see what you’re up to! Thanks for hanging out with me!
🙂 Clearly you are doing a few things right, Pam! Congrats to you on the lease. Can’t wait to see what you’re up to! Thanks for hanging out with me here!
This came up for me as I spoke with a potential client on the phone yesterday. I have a few vision words popping up but I definitely need to spend time with this. Thanks for the timely post!
Good morning, Robyn! How nice to find your voice here! So glad I was in sync with your marketing needs today! Yes, those vision words are a great start. And, if you’re serious about needing to “spend time with this,” I want to encourage you to put time on your calendar every single week to solely focus on figuring out your difference (and the the language to explain it) until you get it done. And, THEN . . . Please come back and talk to us about your process for doing so. I / we look forward to hearing from you!
I love this blog! Tamara! I always come away with good information.
I have a brand new private practice and have been struggling with this very thing. I find myself being very “tentative” on the phone when a new potential client calls my office. I have followed many of the great ideas from your blog (setting fees, insurance vs. no, HIPAA), and had decided to pose this question to you! So, thanks for beating me to it.
I appreciated Melissa’s and Pam’s comments very much.
I have a slightly different perspective I think because I am so new to private practice. When I worked for an agency, the clients were more or less assigned to me. If I was working at the location that was most convenient for them, that pretty much nailed it down. I didn’t have to market myself or recruit clients – I did really good work and helped people get results, focused on treatment plans, and not marketing plans. Now, I find myself at a loss at how to give my “elevator speech” when someone calls inquiring about my services. I taped myself (not the phone call, just had a tape recorder on my desk) so I could hear what the potential client was hearing. I was mortified at how inexperienced and seemingly lacking in confidence I sounded. So, I have been practicing talking to myself when I drive (alone 🙂 ) just to be mindful of the things that I say when I am thinking about myself. It is getting better – but I will probably seek more formal advice so as not to waste even one more phone call.
Kathi, give me a couple of weeks. I’m putting together a little “freebie” for you guys that can help when potential clients call you on the phone. Just need to get it formatted and easily accessible for you. There’s absolutely no reason to struggle with this when I can show you exactly what I do!
Practicing the points you want to make rather than a rigid script will help, too. Just like you know when people are speaking from their heart, your potential clients recognize that same source.
Thanks, Tamara. You are the best!
Kathi
I’ve just learned from great teachers, mentors, clients, and colleagues! And, you’re welcome to every bit of what I know!