Calm Yourself Down – 8 Self-Soothing Techniques

Do you ever find yourself all wound up?  Too excited, too emotional, or feeling overwhelmed?

Here are 8 ways to calm yourself down and regain stable ground.

  1. Listen. Listen to beautiful, calming, relaxing music.  Listen to the rhythm of the ocean’s waves.  Listen to your own breathing.    Listen to a babbling brook.  Listen to the ticking of a clock.  Let the sounds pass into your awareness . . . and let them pass out of your awareness . . . coming in . . . and flowing out.
  2. Breathe in and soften your belly. Breathe out and let your tension go.  Follow your breath in . . . noticing as it goes in your nose . . . filling up your lungs . . . filling up you whole being . . . softening your belly . . . letting the hardness, the holding go.
  3. Ask yourself, “How old do I feel?” Pinpoint the age that you first felt this feeling. Then remind yourself that you are not a child . . . . You are 37 years old and that you can handle this situation.
  4. Give yourself permission to make mistakes. Remind yourself that you are not inherently bad . . . you are not a bad person . . . and that you get to make mistakes.
  5. Take a walk. Take a long walk in a beautiful place . . . in your garden . . . in a park . . . along a river.  Focus on the beauty that you are seeing.  Notice the colors . . . the shapes . . . the textures of all that you are passing.
  6. Develop a practice of meditation. This is not a “quick fix.” In order for meditation to be self-soothing, you need to develop the practice before you need it as a tool for steadying yourself.  (If you are interested in learning how to meditate here in Colorado, I recommend that you contact my colleague, Leslie Vogt, for small-group or 1:1 training.)
  7. Use positive and nurturing self-talk. Remind yourself that you are a good person . . . a kind person . . . and that you deserve to have peace and good things in your life.
  8. Write in your journal. Put your thoughts and feelings in writing.  Use your journal as a private place to “dump” your experiences and explore the meaning of your life.

What is it that you are using to calm yourself down?  Do you have other tips to share?

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